Are you expecting better results in your life? Do you want to achieve more in your career and relationships? I think most people do (and I’m no exception, of course). Most people want to be more successful in whatever they do.
Unfortunately, it’s not easy to get the results we want. We may work hard without ever getting them. That happened in my life and, in reflection, I realize why it happened. There is a quote by Albert Einstein that helps me understand:
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.
That’s exactly what’s wrong with me:
I did things the same way
I might work hard, but I did things the same way. How could I expect different results then?
The solution is obvious:
I must change the way I do things
Changing the way we do things is one of the most difficult things to do. When we do something for the first time, we try to find a rhythm and adapt ourselves to it. But once we adapt to it, we become comfortable and there is inertia that hinders us from change.
Here I’d like to share ten essential things you should change in your life to get what you want. For each point below, I also give you practical tips in the fo
rm of action lists. Here they are:
1. Change your priorities
This is important if you want to live a balanced, fulfilling life. Many people are successful in their career but don’t have good relationships with their spouse or family because of wrong priorities. They put things like money and reputation above their relationships. Don’t let it happen to you. You should put relationships as your top priority.
Another important point is to put your passion above money. When you encounter a situation in your life where you must choose between money and passion, choose passion. Having a fulfilling life is more important than having a lot of money.
2. Change your self-talk
Your self-talk has significant influence in your life. When you say that something is bad, you will – either consciously or not – develop a negative attitude toward it. Look at these statements:
I hate doing this.
I’m not creative.
The situation is too difficult to solve.
Can you feel how such statements influence your attitude? You won’t have positive, winning attitude with this kind of self-talk. The opposite is also true. When you say that something is good, you will develop a positive attitude toward it. Compare the previous statements with these:
I love it!
I’m creative and talented.
The situation is challenging and fun to solve.
Can you feel the difference?
Watch your mind closely. What does it say about something or someone?
Is it negative? If the answer is yes, find a different angle and craft a positive statement in your mind.
Speak out the positive statement in your mind,
Next time when you encounter the negative self-talk again, quickly replace it with the positive one.
3. Change your motivation
Motivation is the reason why we do things. It gives us the power to move and work. You can significantly change the way you do things simply by changing your motivation.
I like to see motivation through Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. There are eight levels of needs there (from the lowest to the highest): physical, security, belonging, esteem, learning, aesthetic, self-actualization, and transcendence. Our motivation is always to meet one or more of these needs. The way to change your motivation is to upgrade your motivation to higher levels in the hierarchy. For example, if your motivation to work is money (which resides in either physical or esteem level), you can upgrade it to helping others (transcendence level).
4. Change your habits
Is there any bad habit that holds you back? If the answer is yes, then you should break the bad habit and replace it with a good one. For instance, perhaps you have the habit of rising late. But – since many people testify that early morning the most productive time – that means that you lose the most productive time of the day. You can get better results simply by replacing the old habit with a new habit of rising early.
5. Change your friends
Changing your friends doesn’t mean discarding your current friends. No, what I mean here is you should change the friends who influence you or, in other words, your close friends. Find close friends who can encourage, equip, and challenge you to move to the next level. If your friends currently do not meet this criterion, find new friends who do. Interact with them and you are more likely to come out as champions in life. Remember, winners breed winners.
6. Change your commitments
You may have commitments in your life that don’t add value to your life. Perhaps you take too many roles or responsibilities. Most likely, some of them just take your resources away from doing the most rewarding ones. You should change your commitments in such a way that you get the most out of your time.
7. Change your inputs
Your inputs determine your outputs. There is no way you can get high-quality outputs if you feed your mind with low-quality inputs. So watch your inputs carefully. What programs do you watch on TV? What books, magazines, or blogs do you read? Discard the low-quality inputs and replace them with high-quality ones.
8. Change your methods
You may have done something for years that you forget there are new, more efficient methods to do it. For example, can you imagine writing a document with a typing machine while everyone has used computer?
It’s essential to monitor your field continuously and adopt new methods that are available. Of course, you should be careful not to try every method. Take only the proven ones.
9. Change your intensity
Perhaps you do not work intense enough these days. If you want to produce more in a given period of time, you need to increase your work intensity. You should increase your focus and energy in doing your tasks. Learn to work intensely for certain period of time and then take true rest before starting another session of intense work.
When you are about to work, turn off your cell phone (or at least put it to silent mode).
Close all unnecessary windows in your computer.
Set a target duration to work and don’t stop before time is up.
10. Change your way of spending
Money is an important resource and the way you spend it will significantly affect the results you get in life. Instead of falling into the trap of consumerism, spend your money to buy asset. Use your money to invest in your future.
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It will be much better if you have the habit of changing. By having the habit of changing, you will change constantly and not just occasionally. To build the habit of changing you should:
Be aware of how you do things Don’t work and live on autopilot. Take a moment to stop and observe how you do things.
Continually find something you can change From your observation, try to find what you can change. They may be some of the ten things above.
Write your findings in a journal Don’t waste your time by finding the same thing twice. Record whatever you find. I prefer electronic journal because it’s searchable, but you can use paper-based journal if you want to.
Take the first step to change
The first step is the most difficult to take since you need to overcome initial inertia. The action lists above gives you some possible first steps you can take.